They literally chose the worst possible place to rob…

News coming out of Brazil today indicates the world’s most ill-advised robbery was attempted in Rio De Janeiro recently.

According to a report from the Portuguese-language news outlet, Globo, burglars attempted to rob a Gracie Jiu-Jitsu Academy in Nova Iguaçu but quickly realized they had made a terrible decision.

Receptionist’s Version of Events

Thanks to the world-famous multi-lingual transcriptionist, Google Translate, we have transcribed the receptionist’s version of events below:

“It was two men. One stayed out on the bike and the other entered the gym. He did not arrive announcing assault. I came to the front desk and asked for information. But as I mistrusted and did not answer, then he jumped the ratchet already asking for my cell phone. He surrounded me on the stairs and tried to take the cell phone out of my hand.

The criminal tugged at my hair to try to lead me closer to him, but I jerked him away. Then, at that moment, he raised his shirt and said, ‘I’m going to kill you.’ But you could not tell what kind of weapon it was. You could not tell if it was a knife or a revolver. My luck was that one student saw the situation and called the other students. Frightened, the bandit ran and fled on a second bike, “said the receptionist

Based on the receptionist’s version of events it sounded like the burglar was just looking to rob her cell phone. Why he chose to attempt such a robbery in a building filled with jiu-jitsu experts is not altogether clear. Drugs or stupidity are assumed to have played a role.

Students Came to Receptionist’s Rescue

Imagine sitting in a Jiu-jitsu school and somebody comes running to say there is a burglar trying to rob the receptionist. First, you’d run to save the receptionist but all the while you’d be thinking “why would some idiot try to rob this place?”. It would have to be a fairly bizarre experience, to say the least.

Globo spoke with Edgar Xavier de Mattos Neto, an instructor at the school:

Professor Edgar Xavier de Mattos Neto, 41, who was in charge of class, said that the case occurred around 7:30 p.m., a time of great movement in that region. The academy is located in the commercial center of the municipality.
“He came in to ask for information and surrendered the employee, who had his cell phone in his hands.” It could have been a tragedy, we ran to try to immobilize him and call the police, “said Neto, market

What Were They Thinking?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWJXLsZZ3Fw

What makes this even more incomprehensible is that it was planned. Since they had somebody waiting on a bike for their expected getaway they actually felt this was a workable plan.

Earlier this summer a robber in Burbank, CA was equally misguided. He tried to rob the Defiant MMA gym and was subdued by Jacobe Powell, who had this to say:

My instincts kicked in, and I used my judo training to go ahead and subdue him.

(I) got the weapon away from him before the cops arrived. One of guys here that was training and i just subdued him until the police showed up.

Previous articleConor McGregor Responds to Max Holloway’s Threats
Next articlePics: Georges St-Pierre’s Flabby Physique is Gone & He’s Looking RIPPED!
Gentleman Jeff
Ian is a MMA writer based out of Toronto, ON Canada. An avid mixed martial arts enthusiast and passionate fan since he was born, Ian has been writing about mixed martial arts for over 5 years.